I totally copped out of last week. I suppose I could’ve taken the chance to bitch and moan about how my guy didn’t win the election (in case you’re reading this anywhere but Canada, we had an election last week, and it was a landslide). But I didn’t really have a horse in this race. Sure, I cast my ballot, and I did it according to my conscience, but there was never really any doubt as to the winner, and anyone who says otherwise is a sucker for opinion polls.
If there could be a term for a grouping of opinions, it would be a poll of assholes. Yet, that’s all I heard for 78 goddamn days. It’s getting ridiculous. First off, casting a vote according to how others are going to vote isn’t just dumb, it’s undemocratic. You’re not supposed to know how the other folks are voting. That’s the idea behind a secret ballot. When I used to work for a polling firm (I was 16, I didn’t know any better, and I needed beer money), our actual
answer rate was below 20%, and most of the people who did answer our polls were either too slow to hang up before I got to the first question, or way too enthusiastic to get under way. Does that seem like an accurate representation of your population? Never mind that, when you get down to the deadline and you need females 18-24, everyone who picks up suddenly turns into a co-ed.
So, aside from the fact that people are now basically too numb-skulled to make up their own mind for whom to vote, and have essentially no ideas of their own, this election saw the return of the “hopey-changey” rhetoric. (Yeah, I’m quoting Sarah Palin. The demented, matronly ursine half-Governor at least got that right.) It’s bullshit. The guys preaching change the hardest are the ones least likely to ensure it comes about. But hey, now that the boys in blue showed us how far right our politics can go, I guess a little swing back to the middle feels like we’re singing fucking Kumbaya in the toilet paper line.
Everyone’s resting easy now, including our foremost attack dog in the fight against the outgoing government: our very own public broadcaster. This morning, I turned on the radio for the first time in years (my media player was on the fritz), and CBC was running a story on a website run from Ottawa that generates an apology for any slight. In writing this, I actually tried 18 different search strings in Google, only to find that seeking apologies is essentially a human pastime. I’ve fucking had it with you people.
I don’t mean to come off like an old curmudgeon. In fact, I skipped last week’s column because that was exactly what I was afraid would happen. But a week hasn’t softened the blow of just how out of whack all of this is. How we keep saying that we care for our fellow humans, but we keep voting in the guys who only want 1% to get richer. I honestly thought the days of Red vs. Blue were behind us, and that we could show the world what a viable third party could do in North America. So my disappointment doesn’t really lie in who got elected, but in who elected them. – JP
(JP Sadek brings his intellect and wit to a site overrun with opinionated, yet passionate yahoos. After successful stints with such acts as The Dead City Rebels, Longtimers, and Tokyo Sex Whale, JP now drums for a fantastic group of doom rockers, Loviatar. When he’s not taking on the life of a family man or ravenous fight fan, JP is hard at work as owner/operator of Wolf Lake Studios, in Lac-Des-Loups, Quebec. Every Wednesday night, HEAD ON A SWIVEL brings a vibrant, yet grounded view on everything from music, the ever-growing world of MMA, politics, art, and everything in between. Check it!)