The summer of 1985 was probably the funnest summer I had. Me and my pals were all 12 years old, and we had a few older friends that helped us with all the stuff a 12-year-old can’t get his hands on. We started experimenting with beer and weed, and shit man, the days were soooo long. We were at the peak of our trouble making immaturity, from egging people to ringing random fucking doorbells and running away to crank calling to breaking through the fence to the Baxter Center where there was a shit-tonne of trouble to be had; so many free bags of chips off those Quickie trucks.
It was a glorious summer, and no summer has come close to beating it for the amount of silly bullshit we got into. Kids had their ghetto blasters out in the parking lot blaring AC/DC or RUN DMC, BMX bike gangs ran amok, and a few of us figured out the fun of firecrackers and stink bombs.
When you don’t have two nickels to rub together, you tend to find the oddest things to pass the time. For us, most of these activities revolved around making ourselves laugh. In our neighborhood, each unit had a screen door that sat in front of the main door. In the summer, this screen door was the main door, and it was usually never locked when someone was at home. This made for easy access.
At first, we tested out the firecrackers in the parking lot. This made us laugh, but it wasn’t until we got the balls to open up some of these screen doors and toss a few firecrackers in that we got the real kick of it. If you think ringing a doorbell and running makes you laugh, try firing a few loud firecrackers into someones living room. Please note that this was long before people were firing fucking guns in the poor neighborhoods in our town – this might not be the best idea these days.
As with everything, the novelty of it all started to wear off. When our pal Donny showed up with some German stink bombs, shit went to the next level. Now it was a 3-kid job. One kid holds the door open, one kid lights a firecracker and tosses it, while Donny would light a fucking stink bomb and toss that puppy in. Jesus fuck that was awesome. It made it all the more fun to know that if any of these residents caught us, they would probably slap us fucking silly, so the rush was even that more powerful when we got away with it. We never did get caught by any of those suckers.
In lieu of having authentic German stink bombs, here are some easy instructions on how to build some homemade stink bombs for yourself.
1. Cut off the heads of a book of matches using scissors. Set match heads aside and throw away the sticks.
2. Place the match heads in a clean, unused bottle with a cap.
3. Pour about two or three tablespoons of ammonia into the bottle. Cap the bottle and swirl.
4. Wait three to four days before opening the bottle. Once unleashed, the smell will send shivers down spines and nightmares into heads. This stink bomb forms ammonium sulfide.
This type of stinkbomb isn’t the light-and-toss type, but just set it down in a mall or something, open the puppy up, and watch the madness ensue. Too much fun. Here are some kids getting into the same shit we did back in the day. Makes me smile.